Today I will kick so much ass.

Yesterday I did not.. Most days are like that. I slept in until I realized I should have had my daughter to daycare already, I rushed us out the door and we ate granola bars for breakfast in the car, she was cranky, I was stressed, I worked through lunch, and then through dinner, left work at 7:30 – by the time I picked up food for myself, I got home just in time to say goodnight to Penny. Days like this are hard on all of us.

But today, today I will kick so much ass.

I’m convinced that somewhere along the line I started my own superstition that if I start the day in a lousy way that it will continue to be a lousy day, sometimes if I stay up too late painting or writing or stealing my moments alone with Mike I might have time to make up for that lousiness, but then I’m overtired the next day and hence the vicious cycle is repeated.

But today, today I will kick so much ass.

Today, the exact alignment of circumstances I needed were in place, I woke myself up at five to six without an alarm and snuck out of bed without waking up my family, one hour flat before they might start to stir, oodles of alone time to do with what I will – do I paint, do I write, do yoga, run? Precious time and a full hour of it completely undisturbed – for a reasonably new mom this is like gold. No one asking me for cereal or coffee, to wipe their bum or iron their shirt…blissful quiet, I do yoga, and then run on the elliptical until the display breaks so I finish out the rest of Yankee Hotel Foxtrot…”I’ve got a camera, in my eye, in my eye….” then stetch, cool down, put the kettle on, exhale…. and for the first time this week I can hear my own thoughts. This is the preciese moment my husband jumps out of the shower running late as usual and starts bustling around and asking me where his blue sweater is….and right on cue there’s Penny crying for me from the bed.

To be continued….but in the meantime:
The ass-kicking will ensue.

continued…
Stealing moments while Penny has potty-time. Was just thinking about what makes today different from yesterday, what gave me a reason to get up this morning. The answer is hope.

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